Wednesday, December 31, 2008

New Years Eve

First of all, I hate how there are a shit ton of daniel chens.  I have never been able to get "dchen, d.chen, d chen, dan chen, daniel chen" or any other shortening of my name as username.  If I could fistfight all the Daniel Chen's of the world to the rightful title and usage of my name, I would.  I hereby challenge all those nerds to a tournament of fist fighting, I'm sure I could probably get to the semi-finals.

  The weather has been overcast and it's been drizzling/raining throughout the entire time i've been here, which makes it kind of hard to walk around since i am vehemently opposed to umbrellas. It's nice walking around in the rain sometimes, even if it's of the "acid" type, due to all the pollution from industry.  

I woke up on new year's eve around 7 30 am.  I would say it's due to the jetlag from travelling across the pacific or the fact that I passed out at 9 the night before.  I finish reading "Haunted" by Palahniuck which I had read once before a few years back when I was on my Palahniuck binge and I still didn't like it.  In fact, I haven't liked his stuff in years since now I just think he's just pushing shit a little too far for pushing shit's sake.  I was pretty disappointed by the novel as a whole, but I guess a few short stories in there weren't so bad.  It's 9 30am by this time and my mom knocks on my door.

"Come out to breakfast with me and your dad."

We stop by this little Chinese kitchen that we always have breakfast and stuff my face like a fat boy.  The bill comes out to $3/person.  I wish this place would become a franchise.  My parents drop me off and they go out.  I go back up to my room on the fourth floor.  It's pretty sweet having my own room out here, albeit no cable television or internet connection (i'm on my mom's mac), but i guess in the end that's probably a good thing.  

I decided that this vacation wouldn't just be plain debauchery and procrastination so I bought a few brushes and water colors before I took off on the 27th.  Just the primary colors and white, just to get back to basics and not let my color mixing all go to shit.  I would post the pictures, but macs are stupid and don't have memory card slots. Get working Steve. My first two attempts were pretty shitty, but after a while everything clicked and  started to flow pretty well.  Adding a new medium to the arsenal is never such a bad thing anyways. 

So i'm doing that for a few hours until about 2pm in which time a.d.d. kicks in pretty strong and I feel an urge to get the hell outside and do some walking around and exploring.  I get the backpack and the krink pens and head out.  I walk about two blocks down and find a hardware store, on display is an arsenal of spray paint. i buy four cans and put them into my defacement survival pack.  life is good.

I take the subway out into the downtown area of kaoshiaong. i have no idea where i am really headed but not knowing where you are and then trying to figure it out is half the fun.  I get out of the subway and figure i'll just walk around for about 4 hours until i have to meet my family for new year's eve dinner which is at 7. I decide that I want to make it to a bar that I always frequent out near the docks called "the pig and whistle", since it's the only English/American style bar out in this city. I've spent many early morning smashed as fuck at this place since i was just a young impressionable adolescent.  There are a lot of foreigners and douchebags alike, at least they play football on sundays.

I stop and ask people on the street how far it is.  They tell me it's across the city. I tell them I'm going to walk there.  They look at me like I'm an idiot.  I guess people in this city don't walk very far.   I keep trying to look for places to tag, but the entire city is teeming with people and besides the one or two quick shitty pen drawings i have time to throw up, no public art gets accomplished, at least not for now.  

I get to this pretty hip little neighborhood full of cafes and boutique shops and try to figure out where all the young kids are going for new year's.  I head into into a trendy little shop and go through some clothes a sales girl comes up to me and we start talking.  Salespeople out here will walk around the entire time with you while you are looking at shit.  It gets a little bit annoying.  I guess if she had been a little bit cuter I wouldn't have minded so much, but she was going a little heavy on the mascara and she also had in fake eye color contacts.  That shit is not attractive.

A lot of guys in Taiwan are really into shopping and buying clothes and being trendy and all that.  They will go to stores together and try on clothes and ask each other whether they think it looks good or not.  maybe they should just take it to the next step and start holding hands.

I walk out the store and walk onto a street i'm familiar with.  I'm about two blocks away from my tattoo shop. I know the owner pretty well and figure i'll drop by and say hello and see if he's got any new shit i might want to get inked on my body.  We chat for a bit and I show him some of my art and he tells me i should get into tattooing.  I am giving it some serious thought. Anyone want a tattoo?

His new assistant is pretty hot, but i think he's banging her and she could use a few hamburgers.  Speaking of hamburgers, I'm pretty hungry by this time and could also use a few drinks.

I walk about 20 minutes further south and finally get to the bar.  I'm the only person there.  I have about an hour so I sit at the bar and order a whiskey soda. I've been having a lot of whiskey sodas lately because i just finished reading "the sun also rises" by hemingway for about the fifth time.  Now i just have to go watch a bull fight in pamplona.  The bartender keeps talking to me and i don't feel like being social so i pull out "catch-22" which i bought at taipei 101 two days ago, i never figured it would be so hard to read a book at a bar.  I have four whiskey sodas for $9 since it's happy hour, buy one get one free from 11am - 5pm. Tits.

I call my dad and figure out where they're going for dinner, I'm late. I hop a cab and head out.  My dad made reservations for a pretty swank place, high society type crowd, not a hot chick in sight, I am a bit disappointed.  Dinner is spectacular and i eat til capacity.  Nobody in my family drinks much, so i have a few mint julips.  We're suppose to attend an event after dinner in their banquet hall with entertainment, whores d' voures, music and all that after dinner. it's about 9 30.  The thought of watching crappy belly dancers and a cha cha band doesn't bode well.  I'm uncomfortably full from being a pig dog and my buzz has worn off. I tell my parents I'm gonna go out for a walk.

I head down along the dock for a bit and finally find a construction site.  There's a bunch of people out still. I hop the fence and walk behind a foundation wall so nobody can see me and get to work with the spray paint.  It's the first time I've tagged a crane.  I go at it for about an hour and head back out to the restaurant.  I've quenched my yearn for crime and it should probably hold me for at least the next day or two.  

I get back and my uncle John has just arrived from another dinner party.  He's a pretty big drinker and we order a fifth of scotch whiskey, it's on the house after he makes a few calls. It's good knowing people in high places.  I get sauced.  The entertainment is bad, but at lest i'm hanging out with my family.  

I've never really made a new year's resolution.  I've always thought is was stupid as fuck when people make some trite resolve.  "being better to family, quitting smoking/drinking, being nicer to people, etc." What the fuck is so special about new year's in which you have to make these promises to yourself.  Couldn't you just do that any other day of the year? If you want self-improvement, just fucking do it, don't put it on your public blog just so that you can feel good about yourself.

And this is going to be a tangent, but I also hate people who write about their religion or evangelize on the internet.  No one cares about how much you love Jesus.  Sorry.

After the countdown everyone wants to go home, but i'm drunk and feel like going out so i get dropped back off at the pig and whistle for some much needed late night carousing.  It's pretty packed downstairs and i need to make it back home so i stay off the hard stuff.  Strictly coors light for the rest of the night.  

I start talking to this Canadian girl, who's teaching english.  Every fucking foreigner out here is teaching english.  At least all the one's not in suits.  We hit it off pretty good and she says she is going to kiss me for new years.  Strictly closed mouth business, I figure i have never been with a Canadian girl before and maybe this could go somewhere.  We start talking about sports and i let slip that watching women play sports is boring.  She gets irritated. She asks to change the subject. I ask her how she feels about Americans.  She wonders if I really want to know. I shake my head and smile.  She says Americans are assholes. I tell her I'm chinese American and she walks away. Me ftw.  

The rest of the night is pretty hazy, but somehow i end up talking to these two girls who are about to head out to an after hours bar.  They invite me along.  One is cute and the other one is pretty haggard.  I just really wouldn't mind the free ride home. I ask them what time it is, 4 30. We leave the bar and head out, turns out the place is closed.  One of the girls takes a cab home with some dude, the ugly one drives me home.  Except she says she's too hammered so i get behind the wheel.  I've heard that a DUI out here costs $3000 but no jail time.  I'll take the risk. 

Miraculously I find my way back to my dad's house and say good bye to the girl.  I might have accidently given her my number.  But I've been handing that shit out like candy lately, hopefully she won't call.  I go to the 7 11 down the street and get some food, it is delicious.  I am glad that I woke up in my bed this morning and not passed out on the couch for my whole family to see and denounce.  I hope they don't think i'm some kind of degenerate, but who am i kidding anyways.  Happy New Year.

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